How do I avoid relationship patterns that sink my self esteem?

I have been single for a little while now (about 6 months) and I am thinking about getting back into dating. One thing that is holding me back is a pattern that I am afraid of repeating. To me the cycle looks like this: I am single and start feeling good about myself, I start dating a few men and end up "committing" to one of them fairly quickly. (This would be okay if I was really into that person, but often I'm not. Or not as much as I'd like to be.) Once I start seeing that new person fairly often, I find that I start to feel less good about myself, and I scare myself with talk of how this is as good as it gets and how I won't find anyone better. Eventually the relationship will end and I will feel exhausted and it will take me quite a while to feel "up" to dating again.

My Ex Wants Me Back But I’m Already Dating Somebody Else

I'm very conflicted. I was seeing a man about a month ago and there was very large single miscommunication between us which led to our splitting. He was quite a bit older, had a child, and a busy job, very attractive physically. Not to mention, our chemistry was amazing, we enjoyed similar things, had the same outlook on life and topics, we had a lot of fun together and I saw potential with him despite age. We also had a rule that if we were sleeping together, weren't pursuing or sleeping with other people. I haven't really stopped thinking about him since we ended really because I didn't understand what happened as there were so many empty spots.

I broke The Rules. Is my relationship doomed?

I started reading Not Your Mother's Rules last night and I think I am really getting an intrinsic understanding of it all, now it is just a matter of not being impulsive and resisting temptation. I would like to know if I have screwed up my current crush, possibility for good?? I was reading in Not Your Mother's Rules that if you make the mistake of talking to/emailing a guy first, you will never know if you were his type. I messaged the guy first on a dating site - does that mean that the relationship would be destined to fail and it is just a matter of when? Or is there a way to back off, create some polarity and purge any bad habits that have been formed by the mistakes that I have made asap? I think you will say to just do the Rules strictly, which of course I plan to make as big of an effort as I can muster, but will the "relationship" always be tainted?

How do I put my wild past behind me?

I am almost 50 and have never been married and have no children. I have been a very independent free spirit all my life. I would describe myself as a creative expressionist who is constantly curious and always working toward finding balance and grace. I am an art teacher and just started online dating. I have been in love and I have had my share of dating american and international men. I am a hopeless romantic and may have been too excited and at times more masculine in my past dating behavior.

Can I change his mind about commitment?

What would be the best way to approach a situation where you’re wanting to rekindle something with someone who didn’t want commitment before? Since the guy in question and I stopped seeing each other, I’ve been dating other guys but … Continued

He stopped texting after we met in person

I met a guy through an online dating app about a month ago. It turned out he lived just under 3 hours away in Seattle. We hit it off immediately! Soon after we were talking everyday about everything and nothing was off the table. Due to some personal issues he couldn't come into Canada so we arranged for me to go to him. My rationalization was that, by the time I actually got to see him we would have been talking for just under a month via, text and phone and Facebook. Our phone conversations always lasted more than an hour to even up to 4 hours some nights. So I bought a ticket and he offered to pay 100 towards my travels in order for me to stay an extra night.

Where can I meet women in Victoria?

I'm a single, 38 year old man working on getting myself out there to meet women. I live in Victoria and I'm wondering if you have any advice for where to start? I've heard it's hard to meet people in Victoria, and since my hobbies are pretty limited to work and my children, I could use some help.

Online Dating Rules

I read your suggestions about broadening my circle to meet people. But my friends don't have single men friends they would set me up with. My work and social life doesn't bring me into contact with single men my age either. I'm in my mid thirties. And most of my interests and hobbies don't seem to attract men to them, so I'm really stuck. I was thinking about online dating. How do I use the rules as a woman on a dating site? How do I employ this mysterious feminine polarity you speak of online? Should I sit back and wait for them to come to me? How much active connecting should I do online?

Rule #6: Live Your Life

Where I ramble on for a really long time about how to take the first step away from waiting, postponing, rearranging & renegotiating your life in order to be available for a man.